As If....

As if things weren't down to the wire already, I just have to laugh. I thank the good Lord for His new mercies that I definitely seek. Also to all of those who are lifting me and my family up in prayers, we need them and they help. I thought today I'd be giving you a date and time of the placement, but I don't. It turns out the lab that we specifically drove out of the way for, so that it'd be easier for U of M to obtain files from, didn't fulfill the lab work. When Seth told me, I just had to laugh. Lately, I'd break down in a sobbing mess, but today the good Lord smiled on me and gave me the ability to let it roll of my back. So, we will go back in tomorrow for the lab work and head over to Ann Arbor for the yet another, not so fun, test. Please continue to pray for me in the way of fear, to be replaced with peace. I have been feeling much despair lately and I have to tell you, it's not good for the soul. I have to stop eating on Sunday at noon until the appt. on Monday. I have sugar spikes and use soy milk to help, so this is going to be a challenge, since I won't be allowed to have it. Please also keep our whole family in your prayers as well. Not only Seth and the kids, but our parents. They love us so much, and it's hard for all of us for different reasons. Our little lady has been much more attached to me and sobs when anyone leaves the house. She's never been one to be insecure, so it's been hard to see her so afraid. Isaiah, he seems to be more taking his aggression out on Aria and snapping a bit at those around us. I've noticed he has a very hard time expressing sadness. It'll normally come out through anger and then he'll say it's about something that has nothing to do with the situation. Seth has really been through a lot this week. Not only is he handling my medical correspondence (or lack thereof) the kids, but now his work has been extremely stressful. He is the only one who does his job. They have been looking for another person that can do what he does, so the shop doesn't fall apart when he is gone, and they haven't found anyone that even comes close. Normally, this would be exciting, to know how valuable he really is, but in this situation, it creates a world of stress. To make matters even just a bit over the top (cause you know we like to go big or go home) Seth was called up for jury duty. The weird thing is, he has always wanted to do this. We ended up having to send the judge a letter to try to put it off for a while, so we are praying they'll be understanding. I think we'll find out in the next week, if the judge will excuse him or not. I have been having to flip through my bible to Matthew about the Do not be worried, a lot. I have always been a planner (us control freaks like it that way) and in my situation, I live minute to minute. Today and yesterday have been really good days, the first out of weeks of seriously tough ones. I am thankful and I can only pray I can have more. I so long for boring and normal. Although, I don't know what it is about Friday's, but I always want to eat Chinese. For a moment I forget that I can't eat it and get really excited and try to think of a way to persuade Seth to order the #2 family package, and then I remember, it's not to be. So, we still need prayers for G-d's wisdom, peace, HEALING, and for direction on this feeding tube stuff. Oy Vey. I'll be updating soon, thank you for your support, we really need it.